Sunglasses before sunrise

I’ve purchased one pair of sunglasses in the 13 years that I’ve lived in Myrtle Beach.

Why buy the milk when you can get the sea cow for free? Wow, not a bad metaphor, just an ugly image. I find sunglasses while walking the beach in the 15 minutes between dawn and sunrise – when tourists are still sleeping or making their morning coffee.

The hip set loses a lot of them on the stretch of beach nearest to my home. The area between 62nd and 68th avenues is designated as one of five zones within city limits in which surfers and kayakers are free to do their thing. Young locals also congregate at the 64th and 65th avenue beach accesses to sunbathe and socialize.

Finders keepers. I’ve lost my share of shades over the years as well. I remember dropping a pair two summers ago. Upon realizing they were missing, I retraced my path and scoured the beach. A hundred yards from me, I saw a man pick up my sunglasses, wipe them off, and slowly put them in his pocket. Those mirrored glasses were cool; I wanted them back.

The guy and his wife were walking away from me and I took off running with one finger raised in the air. “Hey, those are mine!” I yelled. The couple didn’t hear me. I stumbled and gasped. I’m a beach bum, not a sprinter. The couple was still 50 yards away. I thought about shouting again, but I didn’t. He could have them. Finders keepers.

My net at home has 85 pairs of glasses hanging from it. Not long ago I threw out 70 pairs of generic, plastic, men’s and women’s shades. Over the years I’ve worn out or broken another 20 more. I’ve also given away 15 or 20 pairs.

If you’ve lost nice sunglasses in that area, look at it this way: chances are they’re part of a cool collection.

I’ve also found fishing knives and even a nice pair of hook removers while wading through the surf. Still usable, I gave them to friends who fish.

Perhaps the neatest things I’ve found are ammo shell casings fired by jets from the old Myrtle Beach Air Force Base. The base closed in 1993, so Poseidon had them for quite a while.

Years ago, while leaning on a wooden fence on a par three golf course across the highway, we used to watch A-10 Warthogs take off from the base. So, when I find the shell casings, it reminds me of those family vacations and the best times of my life.

The shell casings aren’t worth anything, monetarily. I keep them anyway. Like fossilized sharks teeth, they’re a part of history.